How many actors know the song I titled above? I’m sure many do and I’m sure many non-actors have at least heard of A Chorus Line. If not, Spongebob stated it best!
As you might have seen through my posts, I’m an actor and yes I am so grateful that I am pursuing this not only as my passion, but my career, it can be intimidating and scary some days. Throughout my life, I have struggled with confidence as well as overall first impressions due to me being on the spectrum of Aspergers Syndrome. This speaks many levels for me when I am auditioning for a show, film, etc. I never know how it will end up and that goes for every actor, but for me the stakes get higher for me as I continue to learn how to control my emotions when they are in an anxious state of mind.
The emotions run high because it is like a job interview, you are auditioning FOR A JOB! The casting directors want you to succeed, but you also don’t want to waste their time with the 2 minutes or less you have in the room. So in my head are a million thoughts running through and it is very hard for me to just shut them off because once they’re going I can’t just flip a switch and “Turn It Off” like the Mormons from Book of Mormon said.
The thing about confidence with me comes and go’s, but to help me get out of my negative mindset I think back to a positive and confident young character I played two years ago. J. Pierpont Finch from How To Succeed in Business Without Really Trying.
This has been a dream role of mine ever since I discovered this show in high school. Finch starts off the show as a window washer and with the help of a book titled How to Succeed in…. yadda yadda yadda you get it, he climbs the business ladder of success for the World Wide Wicket Company without really trying. That audition process was one I will never forget. I prepared like there was no tomorrow, going into a room with people you’ve never met before is intimidating, but all you can do is show them your best you and do the work you’ve prepared. Oh and I didn’t forget the words!!! 😀 Then came the callback, another unforgettable day. After hours of singing and acting out sides with others, one hour later I got the call from the director saying I won the role of Finch and I had to pull my car over, get out and do a victory dance and shout. It was the first lead role I had ever earned for a musical and a huge confidence booster. The reason I look up to Finch so much is because he is a confident go-getter, nothing scares him, he is very quick witted and is quite honestly the best B.Ser in the history of B.Sers. Those are qualities I want going ahead in life…. except for the B.S thing! So, as cliche as it is, believing in your work and yourself goes a long way in this business. As forgetful as I am about that, I always look back on the postive auditions I’ve had in my life because I know that when I’m on it, I’m ON IT. Also, it’s good to know I’ve never done anything like This Guy.